Friday, November 6, 2009

Lori's, Vickie's, and Val's

These are the names I am giving my drugs.

Lori = Lortab

Vickie = Vicodin

Val = Valium

I had my post-op visits this past week. I have been taking the first 2 when I feel pain (shivering is the WORST).

I meet with Dr. Klomp (my reconstruction genius). He asked if I was on Valium. Huh? The first thing that pops into my head is The Freshmen by the The Verve Pipe, "His girl took a week's worth of Valium and slept..." (seriously, whatever happened to those guys)?

Isn't Valium for people who are overly excited?

He calmed me by saying it is only a muscle relaxer and he was only going to give me the lowest dose possible. "In fact," he said, "You can even take 2 if you need."

Hmmmm. So I came home, after a painful day of driving and no pain killers and took 2 Valium (the "lowest" dose possible). 30 minutes later, I was high as a kite. I even whomped my head on my boy's bunkbed and started giggling after I fell to the ground because I didn't really care.

Last night, as I was in pain again from shivering at my nephew's football game, I came home and Josh readily had 2 Valium for me. I replaced the one back to the bottle and told him I wasn't going to go there again....one would be plenty.

"Awwww," he whined, "but you were so fun with 2."

And there you have it. A drugged mom and housewife with no chest and my husband is persuading me to take more drugs.

Eye on the prize. Eye on the prize.

5 comments:

Christin said...

That's hilarious. Can I have a few? There are definitely days when I need a good laugh.

Christin

Rach said...

I love that you are so funny. I'm with Christin I would like a few too. My husband and I love reading your other blog.

The Allred Family said...

that sounds fun! How fast can you send it here? :)

Rheanna Bristol said...

Doped or not, you inspire me.

Emily Wolken said...

Keep your chin up Paige! Sounds like you have a great out look. I'm sending love and hugs to you and your family!

Eye on the prize!