Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Things that make me smile!

My friend that I meet my first day of Chemo, Karen, did a posting on her blog titled, "Things that cheer me during Chemo #4." I loved it so much that I took her idea (sorry Karen) and decided to do my own.
#1 My husband....of course. The last couple of nights we have had our own PGA tournament on PS2. Too much fun! And, I actually won him the other night.

#2 My kids:

This is Drue trying to get the baby to smile for the picture. She just loves Ethan so much I have a hard time containing her love. It's a good thing Ethan is a mild baby.

The picture on the right is pretty self-explanatory. Drue was playing house. I am not sure who the mom is but I know that Ethan in the TOY stroller was part of the role playing. He looks pretty content. And Josh? Well, I am not sure what to think about Josh. He would make a cute girl?

Ethan's foot. I could just chew on it all day long. How can you resist such toes.

#3 My family. Immediate and extended. They are such a support to me and keep me going. Thank you.

#4 All of you and your comments. They all make me smile.

The radiologist feels like the margins are safe enough for radiation so I don't have to have another surgery. That is good, eh?

I have enjoyed having these last few weeks off from Chemo. The last couple of days food started sounding good to me again. I have been hoarding like there is no tomorrow. I am stashing up my fat supplies for when I undergo food depletion again.

I have seen 3 shows in the last week. The first was Les Miserables at Tuacahn. Excellent. A few things I didn't like but I think that is just because I have resentment for not being a part of the shows this year. Stupid cancer!

The second was Cabaret put on by The Space Between Theatre Company. They performed it out in Kayenta. Not bad for such a little company. My favorites were the moments played by Richard Hill and Chris Hyatt. It made the show.

The last show I took my daughter to last night. It was High School Musical at SGMT. I have to admit....it was good. I have never seen the movie or any renditioned performance so I had nothing to judge it against. I thought the kids did a great job. Drue developed a little crush on the male lead, Troy. She also has never seen it. By the end she was dancing, clapping and flirting with "Troy." Oh boy. I think I may have to go get her the movie now.

Note: I am not getting paid for any of these reviews.
It just brings me to my #6 item that makes me smile. I love theatre. Good or bad. I love it. I love to critique it. More importantly, I love to be a part of it.

This last picture I stole off of Karen's blog.
It was during our 3rd treatment. Unfortunately the picture was taken right after they started giving me the drug that makes me extremely nauseous. Take note of the vomit bowl on my lap. I thought it added a nice touch. Nonetheless, I love the picture and I love Karen. I couldn't make it through chemo without her. I am sorry you have to go through this Karen but I think God is doing it for me. I know. I am selfish.
Thank you everyone!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008


I found this photo in my picture files. It is my mom and dad's wedding photo at the Salt Lake Temple. I thought it was a nice thing to add.
I was telling someone the other day how I always feel a little weird just talking about myself on this blog. So, I like to add pictures just to take the focus away a little bit. That is why there are random photos on here. If I had pictures to relate to cancer more I would post them but I haven't yet figured out how to take a snapshot of the desctructive little cells.
It has now been a little over a week since my operation and I think I am recovering pretty well. I am sore and have some limited use of my arm but for the most part, I feel great.
This last weekend was the Showell Family Reunion. It was a lot of fun and great to see family members. My cousin, Troy Williamson is as bald as they come so we are quite the match. I actually wore a wig this weekend for a little bit and my entire family said that is almost seems unnatural for me to have hair now. Hmmm.... Interesting.
This is Josh on Mother's Day. Just having fun in a couple inches of water. Ahhhh....to be a kid again.

I got the result back from pathology for my my mastectomy. The tumor was still larger than anticipated. About 4.2 centimeters. My surgeous said she is fairly confident about her margins but there was one area in question. My oncologist also questions it. He said he is not sure we can do radiation. There was some ductal carcinoma that they found so I have to meet with a radiologist doc and he will decide if I can have radiation with those close margins. If not, then I will have to undergo the knife again to clean out more tissue.
I still have 4 more rounds of chemo that are 2 weeks apart. I will start those back up a week from Friday. Then I get this fun drug called Herceptin. It is to get my HER/2 Neu's under control. I will have that for about 1 year.
My oncologist said today that my cancer gives him the "heeby jeebies." I thought that was kind of funny.
And....another cute picture of the baby and my supportive bald husband.
Thank you for all your love. I know. I start to sound repetitive but I don't think I could ever say it enough. Thank you! Thank you!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008


This is the quilt that my family made. Everyone contributed a square to represent their family then my mother-in-law sewed the whole thing together. I thought it was pretty touching. I love it. I wrap up with it every day/night.

Okay. So I am not really sure how to start this one off. I had a "simple mastectomy" on Monday morning. Today is Wednesday and while I would like to say I feel wonderful, it wouldn't be exactly true. I do feel great, all things considered. I truly anticipate the day when I will be all whole again. No aches and pains. No nausea or fatigue. Ahhhhhh, let me relish in those thoughts for a moment.

The surgery went well. My doctor said she thinks she got all the tissue but we will know more when the results get back from pathology. In the meantime, I am back to accessorizing my wardrobe with a lovely drain tube that hangs from under my arm. I think I am going to start a new fashion statement. In my opinion, everyone should try one of these tubes out!

I am a little tender and sore from the surgery. I can't really lift a bunch so I have a lot of help with my baby and the other kids.

Today, I am home a lone. My sister-in-law took my children so I could rest. I figured now would be a good time to catch up on this blog, do some journaling and read up some more on cancer. I have an exciting day ahead of me.

I am not sure when I start chemo again. I meet with my doctor in a little over a week. I guess he will decide when.
This is my daughter in her tap dance costume. I thought she looked adorable as a little flapper girl. She was even more adorable in the dance recital.
She is handling everything well. Sometimes, when she sees me having a tough day, she gets a little emotional. She gave me her "blankie" that she has had since she was a baby. She told me to sleep with it so it would help me get better. I haven't gone a night without it yet. She is so sweet.
I still appreciate all you prayers and words of encouragement.
I love you all!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Good news!

Alright! I am so excited. Firstly, I don't have to have a treatment this Friday so I will actually get to enjoy my time camping with the entire family. "Why?" You ask? Well, I went to the doc yesterday and he said my PET Scan looked really really good. He said instead of waiting after the 8th chemo treatment to have surgery, he just wanted to get the little bugger out immediately. Yeah! I get to have my breast whacked off. I know. I never thought I would be excited to hear myself say that. In addition to this fantastic news, he said I would probably only need 4 more treatments instead of the originally intended 12! He said, and these are his exact words, "This has been kick butt chemo." I would have to agree.

So, on Monday I go in for my first mastectomy. I will have the other one removed when I am all done with chemo and radiation and all cancer free! Celebrate with me! I am!

In other news, we blessed Ethan this weekend. Josh's family came to visit and it was wonderful having them here. I have pictures of the blessing but Josh took the camera to work with him today so I won't be able to post the pictures until later.

My family made a beautiful quilt for me. It is absolutely gorgeous and I cried when I saw it. Again, I will have to post a picture of that one later too. I just didn't want to wait to share the good news!

This picture is of all my in-laws in Georgia. They decided that instead of shaving there heads they would strike a pose with bald caps for me to show there support. I especially love the painted on eyebrows!

Enjoy. I will post more later!